Conversio Virium

CV Meeting: Your Secret Map to the World of Kink Ethics as drawn by Praxis Productions, a.k.a. the Corey and Jay show

Ethics are the quest for base guidelines to life’s big questions. Ethics can be a place to go when you need a map, or a way to counter external judgment. They can be a way to clarify philosophy and action, or a way to break old patterns of dysfunction. Ethics are guaranteed to make your kink life, relationships, and fuck ups much more complex and interesting. In this rollicking interactive extravaganza, Jay and Corey will offer you a starter pack of our Super Secret Universal Four Pillars of the House of Kink Ethics*. We will also give you the tools to build your own system of kink ethics. It won’t protect you from heartbreak or herpes but it can help you maintain your integrity.

*number and context subject to change.

CV Special Event: Erotic Breathwork with Barbara Carrellas

**Reservations for this event will end at 8:00 PM Sunday November 18^th. No information will be forwarded to those who RSVP after the cut-off so that we can ensure that we will have enough space for this popular event.**

Some of the CV crew met Barbara at Floating World this summer. I was fascinated by her unique classes and by a spiritual side of sexuality I had not considered before. She has kindly agreed to grace us with her presence and expertise in erotic breathing.

Here is Barbara‘s description of the workshop:

Breath is your greatest source of energy and aliveness. It can produce so much pleasure, it will amaze you. Once you become familiar with moving erotic energy around with your breath, you’ll find all your erotic encounters to be much more fulfilling. Your orgasms will be longer and deeper. You will share a more authentically intimate connection with a partner. You’ll even find yourself using breath techniques in non-erotic situations to bring erotic energy to more and more areas of your life.
In this workshop we will learn and practice a variety of simple breath techniques that you can put together to to create unlimited erotic possibilities. Then we’ll put them together to explore the the vast range of orgasms which lie beyond those achieved by genital stimulation. Finally, we’ll practice energy orgasm techniques that you’ll be able to incorporate into whatever kind of sex and play you enjoy.

Important Note: This meeting will not be held at its usual time and place. Read post for more details and instructions.

Since this meeting will require more space than usual, as well as a little more time, we kindly request that you RSVP in advance by emailing conversio@columbia.edu. Only those who are on the list will be allowed to attend. If you are a CV member, please give us the name that is on your membership card or your name on your CUID, which will be used to verify your reservation. If you are not a CV member, please provide a name which you can verify with a form of ID. Non-Columbia University affiliates should state their affiliation (university, organization, friendship, etc.) in their RSVP email. As always, all are welcome.

In addition, we will not be allowing entry after 9:00 PM so that we can get started with the workshop. Doors will open at 8:30 PM. Barbara’s books will be on sale after the workshop at 11pm.

Location: Will be announced upon reservation.

This event is being held thanks to the cooperative support of Q at Barnard College.

CV Meeting: Sexy Halloween Fright-Fest

Join us this week for a Halloween party in which we invite you to bring your best in BDSM erotic literature, and/or scary stories. We’ll gather around an imaginary campfire in 301 Hamilton and see who can deliver the most thrilling, heart-stopping tale of horror and raunch. Dress in costume, or spooky old everyday clothes, whichever you like. Come a little early if you’d like to help us create some Halloween ambiance.

Note: There will be NO meeting next week (November 5th) due to academic holidays and election day, so get your CV fill this week.

CV Meeting: Flogging 101 with Virgil

One of our former Presidents of Vice, Virgil, is back with an old favorite: The Joy of Floggers and Flogging. Join us at the usual time and place for a bit of fun with some of our favorite versatile leather (or otherwise) instruments. If you have a flogger, bring it. We’ll be doing a little bit of show and tell in the beginning.
Also, let us all join together and think of how far CV has come since the last class we had on flogging.

CV Meeting: Dominance and Near-Death Experiences with Jeff

Jeff Mach of Wicked Faire presents on Dominance and Near-Death Experiences: A practical guide to the psychology and physicality of working with the idea, the threat–and some of the actualization–of taking arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing, end them. With demonstrations.

CV Meeting: Sexual Teasing and Denial with Sara and Maymay

Now that we all learned how to tie somebody up, what do you do next? You have lots of choices, of course. Beat them, tickle them, hurt them…but why not tease them?

Oscar Wilde described this delicious topic best: “The suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.” Sara and Maymay will discuss the myriad reasons the prolonged suppression of orgasmic release and the manipulation of sexual arousal is such a turn-on. Learn about some techniques, history, and specialty toys used in the practice of controlling another’s orgasm, and how communication, creativity and intimate knowledge of your partner can make lust a fun and fascinating part of your toy bag.

This is a presentation born out of a CV meeting where Sara presented on the topic back in 2005. This expanded presentation, which will cover chastity play, orgasm denial, and more, was also a feature at the inaugural Floating World event this past Summer.

For those who missed the meeting or for those who attended and want to check out an earlier recording of the presentation and followup interview with Tom Allen of The Edge of Vanilla, take a look at Episode 6 and Episode 7 of Kink On Tap.

CV Meeting: Bondage 101 with Dov

Want to tie someone up but the ropes keep unraveling at their ankles? Worried about what to do if you tied a knot a little too well? Come to Bondage 101 and get the basics of beautiful and functional rope-work from our fabulous Shibari-loving Dov.

This will be a very hands-on workshop. If you have it, bring four lengths of 30-foot rope that is 4–8 milimeters in diameter and, of course, someone to tie up! If you don’t, there’s no need to fret. We’ll provide extra lengths of rope and there are sure to be at least a handful of eager bottoms around! ;)

BC Lecture: In the Heat of the Moment

The Barnard College Psychology Department is pleased to host the following lecture:

In the heat of the moment: The effects of mood and sexual
excitation/inhibition on sexual interest, arousal, and risk taking.

Erick Janssen, Ph.D.
Director of Education and Research Training
The Kinsey Institute

Interested students, staff and faculty are cordially invited to attend
this lecture.

Location: Sulzberger Tower North (Sulzberger Hall, 17^th floor), Barnard
College (117^th St. and Broadway).

NCSF: Survey of Violence & Discrimination Against Sexual Minorities

From an email sent by NCSF today:

Stand Up and Be Counted!

Participate in the Survey of Violence & Discrimination Against Sexual Minorities

September 19, 2007 b New York, NY – Susan Wright and Larry Iannotti would like to announce the launch of the second national Survey of Violence & Discrimination Against Sexual Minorities, being conducted in cooperation with the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom. This survey includes all of the questions asked on NCSF‘s ground-breaking 1998 Violence & Discrimination Against Sexual Minorities survey, and includes new questions on personal, business, and Internet discrimination experienced by BDSM-leather-fetish practitioners.

The link to the survey is on NCSF‘s website: www.ncsfreedom.org

Please take a minute to fill out this anonymous survey even if you have not been a victim of violence or discrimination. Demographic data and information about participation in a variety of BDSM-leather-fetish activities are also being gathered. This survey will be distributed for one year, and the results will be
released in early 2009.

The results of this survey will be analyzed and compared to the 1998 survey, which found significant discrimination and violence occurring against BDSM-leather-fetish practitioners. The data may be used in court obscenity cases to prove that sexual minorities have been chilled on the Internet because of fear of prosecution. The survey also includes space for individuals to write about the discrimination they have faced, which will be helpful in illustrating the consequences of the negative stereotypes about BDSM-leather-fetish activities.

The survey is available on Survey Monkey (a secured survey hosting website that is used by the professional community) and can be accessed through the NCSF website: www.ncsfreedom.org.

Larry Iannotti, LCSW, is a professional social scientist and practicing therapist getting his doctoral degree through the City University of NY. Susan Wright is the Media Spokesperson for NCSF, and is accredited as a research assistant affiliated with CUNY.

Former CV President-of-Vice Bootblacks in Boston

Kyle, CV’s former President of Vice before yours truly, is participating in the Mr. Boston Leather contest as Judge’s boy.

[Kyle] is currently an associate brother in the New York boys of Leather, after being a full brother for a year and a half. From 2005-2006 he served as the Vice President for Conversio Virium, the BDSM discussion/education group of Columbia University. Kyle moved to Boston at the end of August and has started working as a bootblack at the Ramrod. While his primary D/s relationship is with Northeastern University’s School of Law, he still finds time to engage in extracurricular activities.

Just feast your eyes on all that sexy leather. If you’re going to be in the area, wish him luck from all of us here in New York!

First CV meeting of Fall 2007 “Show and Tell”

Welcome back everyone! Join us for our first meeting of the year, in 301 Hamilton. Bring friends, artwork, toy bags, pervertibles, and kinky summer memories; whatever you feel comfortable sharing with the class.

There will be snacks, old friends, new friends, announcements of some things we have planned for the year, stories from a kinky summer past, recaps from Floating World, and an open forum for potential presenters to pose presentation ideas and much, much more. We hope to see you there as we have sorely missed all of you during our time away.

Please note: we have updated (and expanded) our location! This year, all weekly meetings will be held in 301 Hamilton.

CU Activities Fair, Calling all Members!

CV needs you to volunteer for manning the tables at the CU activities fair the first week of school. Volunteers will need to speak a little bit about the club to students on campus (particularly new students) at our table. We will have a large BDSM flag (courtesy of The Noose’s closing sale) denoting our table, as well as some little kinky slips of paper with our URL on them. We will also have some toys, whatever toys you bring, and some kinky literature (de Sade and the like). Let us know if you are available at all, even if only for an hour. We will send out a schedule once we have some more volunteers.

The Noose Closing Sale

The Noose, a long-standing fetish, leather, and bondage shop in Chelsea, has announced its closing sale since it will be going out of business at the end of this month. From the announcement on the Floating World email list:

The Noose will be closing it’s doors permanently August 31, 2007. Everything is on sale. Whether you want a new set of cuffs, a leather jacket, or Corset. You’ll find your desired items at 50% or more off! Please phone the Noose to check that they are open for their schedule of hours. The answering machine at the store does not answer.

Most of their leather apparel is designed for men, but other items are more universal. You never know what goodies you might find. I was rather lucky myself. I got a large BDSM flag, a terrifyingly huge butt-toy, and a heavy new nightstick all for under $60.

Museum of Sex presents “Pink Japan”

For those of us who left our Kinky Japan meeting last year wanting a little more, or weren’t sure how much to believe, the Museum of Sex will be having a Slideshow/Lecture presentation on “Pink Japan: Contemporary Sex Culture”, presented by Midori. The blurb sounds quite promising, and you can be sure I’ll be there. I suggest, buying tickets in advance and make sure to get a student discount if you can.

Here is a selection of the blurb from the site:

From cuisine, music, fashion, technology to anime, Japan’s cultural influence on the West is immense. In many ways the Japanese erotic cultures are also influencing today’s Western tastes. Yet the daily realities of Japan’s gender relations, sexual habits, sexual consumer culture and gay/lesbian/transgendered world remain hidden to us, creating an aura of mystique. In this funny and insightful talk, join Midori for a double-expatriate’’s photo tour of Japan’s hidden sexual culture today.”

Tickets can be purchased at the museum’s front desk or by calling (212) 689-6337 ext. 115.

Amendments to the Constitution

Before the beginning of the semester, the Executive Board will be preparing all 2007 amendments to our club’s constitution. Anyone who is eligible for or currently holds full membership will be able to propose changes and vote to ratify said changes.

Please take some time to read through our constitution, which was last edited in 2002. Remember that if you have already signed a membership statement, you have agreed to uphold this document, so it might be a good idea to know what it says. This especially applies to the Articles regarding Meeting Conduct and Membership.

Some of the changes we are hoping to make this academic year will make the rules of membership clearer and to include the website administration as a special committee, as well as to provide provisions for web conduct and official recognition of the important work being done on the site. We want to expand the confidentiality clause to specifically address members of the media. We would also like to conduct a deadwood check so that we can destroy old member documents as per Article IV Section 1.7 and Section 3.  All of these changes are intended to help our club run more smoothly and to further protect the confidentiality of our members and meeting attendees. Please comment here with your thoughts, as members have the authority to propose or oppose any changes to this document.

A lovely little citation

Doing one of my frequent Google searches of CV, I found this little scholarly piece which cited us in 2005. While I was not very involved in CV at that time, it makes me proud to know that the information this author found so helpful still stands on our new site, even now. The bit where the author, Nicole Eitmann, cites our site discusses our faithful old motto, SSC.

From Nicole’s paper, On Sadomasochism: Taxonomies and Language:

A final complication concerns the slippage in the public imagination from S/M to physical abuse and forced sex. Conversio Virium, a BDSM (bondage and discipline S/M) support group at Columbia University, has developed a policy statement outlining the differences between S/M and abuse. According to the group, “S/M includes intimate activities within the scope of consent that is freely given”, while abuse is defined as “acts inflicted on a person without their freely given consent.”⁴⁸ A popular phrase among the S/M and fetish communities is that all sexual encounters should be “safe, sane, and consensual.”⁴⁹ The limits of S/M encounters are mutually agreed upon by both participants, and a safe word that when uttered means the scene must end immediately, is arranged. The “safe, sane, consensual” benchmark is also adopted by the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF), an advocacy group supporting the rights of sexual minorities, specifically practitioners of S/M,⁵⁰ although some in these communities question the applicability of this slogan to all who practice BDSM. One S/M participant noted that, “Sane is so close to meaningless for me that I find it useless. Who is to say what is sane? Shall we pass judgement on each other, as to whether people and/or activities are sane?”⁵¹ Such individuals do not question the propriety of the standard of consent, but do raise an interesting issue of how safety and sanity are determined, and by whom. Even the S/M guidelines published by Conversio Virium highlight consent as the most essential aspects of S/M, and stress the importance of mutual pleasure and respect in the S/M relationship.⁵²

Things like this remind me that, even when our club is spoken of by sensationalist bloggers who can usually only see dirty side of CV, we are actually making a positive difference in the way the community to which we belong (and have, to some degree, created) is viewed by the rest of the word. Hooray for taking some of the bias against BDSM and its practitioners out of sociology (and for my run-on sentences)!

Floating World

CV is going to Jersey this summer. Join us, if you can, at Floating World at the end of this summer. CV members will be presenting, participating and otherwise perusing the convention center at what is sure to be the most talked about event of the year. The organizers advertise it as the largest play space in the Northeast. By registering as a member of CV, there is a slight discount, though volunteering is the cheapest way to attend. Contact us, or the organizers of Floating World if you have any questions. Let us know if you are attending so that we can all make sure to find each other. Hope to see you there!

P.S. You can find me at the Dog and Pony Show for sure!

Single Men in Scene Spaces: How do you feel about “wankers”?

In a rare moment of leisure, I sat down to catch up on my reading this morning. Tristan Taormino, who some of you may remember from my countless outbreaks of praise, as well as Sexhibition a few weeks ago, wrote a thoughtful article in the Village Voice addressing an issue I have had mixed feelings about: the treatment and exclusion of single men in public scene and sex spaces.

If you have a moment, check out the article and share with us your feelings. Do you agree that it is a problem that single men are treated with suspicion because it puts a limit on the sexual freedom we promote, or on the other hand, is it a necessary evil which must be tolerated in order for others to feel comfortable in these public spaces?

If CV were to organize a club event, this is an issue that would have to be settled, and I have heard strong feelings on both sides of this argument. Feel free to comment here with your thoughts.

End of the Year Party!

It’s been quite a year and CV’s been through some wonderful changes. We’ve heard some never-before held talks by some of the most interesting, intelligent and unique kinky people on the scene. We’ve made new toys, learned new skills and made some fabulous new kinky friends. If you haven’t been able to make it to many meetings this year or semester, now is your last chance.

Say farewell to Spring 2007 with your pals at CV in the most amusing way we know how: kinky show and tell! Tell a fascinating little something about yourself that no one knows, or bring a kinky trinket to spark some imaginations. Whatever you can dream or dig up. If you can’t think of anything, just bring yourself.

See you all there!

*We will also be unveiling the winner of the Logo contest.

Sexhibition! 2007

Morning Event: 

Come one, come all to the sexiest fair on campus. Join us for Sexhibition (link now defunct), a consent-based sex-positive fair featuring loads of goodies including workshops, breast cupcakes, penis cookies, games and prizes. By attending the fair, you may enter a free raffle to win sex toys given out at our evening event! The fair will take place on Barnard’s Lehman Lawn or in Lower Level McIntosh in case of rain.

After the fair, please join the coordinators of Sexhibition at 8:00 PM in Sulzberger Parlor for a talk by award-winning author, columnist, editor and sex educator Tristan Taormino (if you were at the puppy play talk, you may remember hearing Tyler’s praises for her).

Evening event: The Path to Sexual Empowerment

What is sexual empowerment? What does it mean to be sexually empowered? Tristan Taormino reveals the pleasures and pitfalls of her journey from law school reject to sex expert—with stops along the way as editor, author, anal sex guru, Village Voice columnist, sex-positive event producer, and feminist pornographer. She’ll explore the concept of erotic power, discuss why it is important, and share her unique recipe for how everyone can become sexually empowered.