Conversio Virium

TES Meeting: Kidnapping with Soulhuntre

TES’s general-attendence meeting this week is going to be all about Kidnappings with Soulhuntre:

Just what is a kidnapping scene and how do you set one up? Discussion will cover pre-scene negotiations, pre-planning, set-up, involving others, participant safety and limits. Private vs. Event kidnappings, Abductions, Role Play, and Fantasies that work and some that don’t (or are practically impossible) will be also be covered.

(Do you know of an event that you don’t see on our calendar and want to share? Please send it in!)

CV Meeting: Pushing the Limits of Sane in SSC with Blaise

Safe, Sane and Consensual is the motto of many BDSM educators and organizations including CV. Sanity, however, is one category which is especially subjective. Blaise will lead a discussion about substances and how their use pushes the limits of SSC in a scene.

TES Meeting: Multiple Subculture Diversity

How many subculture interests do you have or how many subcultures do you identify with? I can name at least seven right off the top of my head: I’m a Trekkie, a Star Wars geek, a computer nerd, an anime otaku, I’m polyamorous, and of course, I’m a BDSM submissive. I’m also a juggler and love hanging out with all my “circus arts” friends. Then there are friends who cross over into even more subcultures.

The Switchables Group at TES is going to discuss the phenomenon of why and how kinky people often identify with multiple, diverse subcultures in their next meeting this Wednesday called Trekkies and Witches and Wenches, Oh My…:

There are many people in the SM scene who also have other unusual or “alternative” interests. What attracts them to these other Scenes? What do they have in common? Could it be that, when you accept one unusual idea, it’s that much easier to accept another? Let’s discuss this and find out more with our panel of fellow kinky folk who are also involved in Sci Fi, Fandom, Paganism & Wicca, Renn Faires/SCA/medieval recreationism, and/or the Goth Scene.

TES Meeting: Body Image Forum moderated by Sir Guy

Lest you think the BDSM and other alternative sexuality crowds are immune to mainstream influences and societal pressures, just take one good look around you at the media that’s marketed to us and the things we talk about. The fact is, members of fringe cultures like ours still face the same struggles as people firmly rooted in the center of the mainstream.

Furthermore, people face such issues regardless of their gender identity or sexuality; men have body image issues as do women, and tops, dominants, submissives, and bottoms all often struggle with reconciling an idealized image of sexuality with what they personally find to be comfortable and enjoyable.

This week’s general-attendance TES meeting is the “Body Image Forum” a panel moderated by Sir Guy:

A long willowy blonde with legs up to there, clad in skin tight leather, clutching a bullwhip. A muscular, tan and teasing 20 something with a firm butt protruding through black leather chaps. The tiny Asian, bound in colorful ropes, with nary an ounce of fat on her flexible little limbs. These are the images often seen in magazines and films of BDSM practioners. But is this reality? Is there pressure, even within the community, to conform to these images of young, lithe, totally fit practitioners of BDSM and fetish? Join Sir Guy and the panel as we explore body image in the Scene.

Sir Guy has a proven track record of bringing intelligent, thought-provoking discussion to the forefront of the kinky community (like his recent People of Color Forum) and I would just like to take this opportunity to applaud his persistence in bringing even more of these important issues to light!

TES Meeting: Leather Contests…More Than Just Stand and Pose

When I first heard about the concept of leather contests, I balked. “How can you judge something so personal?” I wondered. Later, I learned that in fact these contests weren’t always stand-and-model pageantry but were instead educational events, and the contestants were all judged on how well they were able to educate others about their lifestyle.

This Tuesday’s TES meeting, titled Leather Contests…More Than Just Stand and Pose, is your chance to learn about leather contests from current and past leather titleholders:

Join current and past titleholders as they discuss the qualifications necessary and responsibilities of being a Leather titleholder. Many people are surprised to learn how rigorous the judging can be and how much of a titleholder’s year is spent on educating both Scene and non-Scene members about what it is we do. Come and meet the people representing you to the public. Audience participation is welcome.

NCSF: Sensationalized Sex with Susan Wright at GMSMA Leatherfest

NCSF’s founder, and one of only three women who are honorary members of GMSMA, Susan Wright will be presenting “Sensationalized Sex” during GMSMA’s Leatherfest this Saturday.

It’s a look at the past 10 years of NCSF’s media activism, and the strategies we’ve developed to combat the way the media encourages the stigma about alt sex. I’m bringing copies of the Concerned Women for America’s press release about My Viscious Valentine in 2002, when they declared the event hazardous to the health and reporters repeated their lies. I’ll also bring the Missouri State Senate resolution that barred BDSM activities in the state—which NCSF got shelved. Plus much more!

Susan Wright is a passionate and inspirational speaker, leader, and activist. She gave a similar presentation as this at this past Summer’s Floating World convention and I was so impressed I wasn’t the least bit disappointed that I had to miss the presentation on fucking machines. Yes, she’s that good.

Kinky Jews: Trivia Night

Wondering what happened to your religion with all the hooplah over sex? Well, if you’re Jewish (or at least interested in Judaism), check out some the events hosted by the New York City-based Kinky Jews group. This Sunday from about 5 to 7 PM, they’re hosting an informal meet-and-greet at the Karma Hookah Bar at 51 1^st Avenue between 3^rd and 4^th Streets. The event will have a “trivia night” theme:

Come meet other members of KinkyJews for a night trivia and hookahs at Karma Hookah Bar. Compete against other members of the group and see how much you really know about sex, Judaism, and other surprise topics.

[…]

OPEN TO: 21 and over. ID Required.

RSVP: Required, e-mail contact@kinkyjews.com. Once you RSVP, you will receive our mobile phone number to help you find us in the back of the bar (if you haven’t been to an event before).

COST: Approximately $10 minimum required per person (for the hookahs—regardless of whether you smoke or not).

Special thanks to Naomi for sending us this event! Now, if only someone can convince the Kinky Christians to start a New York City chapter…. ;)

Polyamorous NYC: Exploring Intimacy in Poly Relationships with Kyle Applegate

Just in time to help spread some Holiday love around the table this year Polyamorous NYC is having their regularly-scheduled monthly meeting hosted by the good folks at the LGBT Center. The invitation from Polyamorous NYC’s announcement list (which I encourage you to sign up for) reads as follows:

If you are in town and are wondering were to go the night before Thanksgiving Day […] I would like to officially invite you to the next Polyamorous NYC meeting on Wednesday, November 21^st from 8–10 PM at the LGBT Center at 208 West 13^th Street, room 412. Admission is $6.00.

The topic will be: “Exploring Intimacy in Poly Relationships,” facilitated by Kyle Applegate.

[…]

“What is unique about intimacy in polyamorous relationships, that doesn’t apply in monogamous ones? Why are poly people often accused of having a fear of intimacy? Does having several partners detract from your level of closeness, or add to it?”

Facilitator Kyle Applegate, is a certified Tantric Coach and Sexual Healer as well as being a Peer/Community Educator specializing in gender studies and diversity awareness. Kyle is also a long-time member of the polyamorous community.

Kyle Applegate isn’t just a generous volunteer for Polyamorous NYC, Tantric Coach, and successful polyamorous community member, but some Conversio Virium members will also recognize him as a fantastic bootblack and volunteer member of events such as Leather Pride Night. Kyle has years of experience and coupled with his great leadership ability this is a meeting I would personally highly recommend.

TES Meeting: Brutal Affection with Felice Shays

Tonight’s TES Novice Group meeting is all about really rough sex. From the TES calendar, “Brutal Affection: Punching, Kicking, Slapping & Sex” with Felice Shays is described as follows:

It ain’t about the brawn. Regardless of your size, experience, gender, or physical ability, this highly interactive meeting uses scads of demos to teach you fierce, passionate methods of slam, slap, thud and mmmm. Learn to use your brain and a multitude of body parts to bring you and your partners to new found levels of physical, sensual, sexual intensity and intimacy. We are thrilled to bring you well known Scene educator and one of our favorite people, Felice Shays, to be your guide on this intense and super HOT topic. With humor, affection, straight talk, and smarts, Felice will give you all the basics and more! Participation is optional – but we bet you’ll want more!

Pleasure Salon: November Meeting

Patricia Johnson, Selina Fire and friends are once again hosting their monthly Pleasure Salon meeting, this time for November:

The Pleasure Salon has been created to build community, allowing sex-positive activists to cross-pollinate. Our gatherings bring together members of the BDSM, swinger, alternative gender, LGBT, sex-activist, nudist, sex-magic, polyamory, Pagan, radical faerie, tantra, dark odyssey, sex-blogger, porn, pervert and sex-worker communities, and others whose passion is sex. (Let us know if we missed any one of you!) Through building networks in the sex-positive community, The Pleasure Salon hopes to help create a sex-positive world. It is a place for the open exchange of ideas and sensual expression.

We have been thrilled by the turnout at previous gatherings. A community of New York area Pleasure Positive folks is developing rapidly, and we hope that you will join us or continue to be part of it. Please invite your like-minded friends. In keeping with the spirit of Dark Odyssey, we encourage everyone to embrace the basic principles of respect, tolerance, acceptance, openness, and non-judgmental support.

Our next event will be Thursday, November 29^th 6–10 P.M., at Marion’s Marquee Lounge, 354 Bowery at 4^th Street.

DSF meeting: The World of Violet Wands with Joseph

This Friday’s DomSubFriends meeting will cover everything you ever wanted to know about The World of Violet Wands but didn’t know who to ask. From the meeting description:

Violet Wands are definitely one of the most exciting and desirable toys available for BDSM play. They are incredibly versatile, providing many different levels of intensity, technique and sensations.

This demonstration will start with a brief discussion on the history and safety surrounding the Violet Wand. It will then move quickly into the basic, advanced and even extreme uses and techniques involving electric play with a Violet Wand. Audience participation is encouraged as this is a ‘hands-on’ workshop.

LPN 2007 Flea Market returns at GMSMA Leatherfest

Those of us who were there know that this past year’s Leather Pride Night was a great success, but it was missing one very important feature: the leather flea market! Well, thanks to popular demand, the flea market will still happen this year, only as a part of GMSMA’s Leatherfest instead of Leather Pride Night.

The LPN Flea Market will be held inside a room on the 3^rd floor of the LGBT Center on November 17^th, between 3 and 9 PM. This is a great chance to find all sorts of leather and fetish accessories with just the right look and fit. Maybe you’ll even find the perfect set of manacles you’ve always wanted to see your lover in. ;)

If you would like to help, the organizers are still looking for volunteers.

TES meeting: Male Supremacy vs. Female Supremacy

Is dominance inherently linked to gender? Some people think so while others think that gender superiority is ignorant crap.

This Tuesday, a TES panel discussion will debate the merits of male supremancy and female supremacy:

In the heterosexual side of our Scene, there are those who feel that their Dominance is based on and/or justified by their gender’s “supremacy”, or their submission is based on the other gender’s supremacy. Join us for a not-so-politically-correct meeting on this controversial topic!

CV Meeting: Your Secret Map to the World of Kink Ethics as drawn by Praxis Productions, a.k.a. the Corey and Jay show

Ethics are the quest for base guidelines to life’s big questions. Ethics can be a place to go when you need a map, or a way to counter external judgment. They can be a way to clarify philosophy and action, or a way to break old patterns of dysfunction. Ethics are guaranteed to make your kink life, relationships, and fuck ups much more complex and interesting. In this rollicking interactive extravaganza, Jay and Corey will offer you a starter pack of our Super Secret Universal Four Pillars of the House of Kink Ethics*. We will also give you the tools to build your own system of kink ethics. It won’t protect you from heartbreak or herpes but it can help you maintain your integrity.

*number and context subject to change.

TES meeting: Being Green in the Scene (Handling Jealousy)

This Wednesday, the TES Relationships SIG tackles the ever-challenging issue of handling jealousy in non-monogamous relationships:

“Poly”…”Play Partner”…”Leather Daddy”…”Collared”…”Uncollared”…”Play Date”…. All these terms swirl about the Scene and may sound fabulous and very cool…until you are actually faced with your partner playing with someone else…or wanting to add a third…or a fourth…or…are you desiring to play with another and your partner isn’t quite thrilled about the prospect. How do you deal with jealousy? How does it affect relationships? How did it affect yours? Please join the Relationships Group as we once again delve into this uncharted territory. Audience participation is encouraged. Let’s talk and gain knowledge from each other.

CV Special Event: Erotic Breathwork with Barbara Carrellas

**Reservations for this event will end at 8:00 PM Sunday November 18^th. No information will be forwarded to those who RSVP after the cut-off so that we can ensure that we will have enough space for this popular event.**

Some of the CV crew met Barbara at Floating World this summer. I was fascinated by her unique classes and by a spiritual side of sexuality I had not considered before. She has kindly agreed to grace us with her presence and expertise in erotic breathing.

Here is Barbara’s description of the workshop:

Breath is your greatest source of energy and aliveness. It can produce so much pleasure, it will amaze you. Once you become familiar with moving erotic energy around with your breath, you’ll find all your erotic encounters to be much more fulfilling. Your orgasms will be longer and deeper. You will share a more authentically intimate connection with a partner. You’ll even find yourself using breath techniques in non-erotic situations to bring erotic energy to more and more areas of your life.
In this workshop we will learn and practice a variety of simple breath techniques that you can put together to to create unlimited erotic possibilities. Then we’ll put them together to explore the the vast range of orgasms which lie beyond those achieved by genital stimulation. Finally, we’ll practice energy orgasm techniques that you’ll be able to incorporate into whatever kind of sex and play you enjoy.

Important Note: This meeting will not be held at its usual time and place. Read post for more details and instructions.

Since this meeting will require more space than usual, as well as a little more time, we kindly request that you RSVP in advance by emailing conversio@columbia.edu. Only those who are on the list will be allowed to attend. If you are a CV member, please give us the name that is on your membership card or your name on your CUID, which will be used to verify your reservation. If you are not a CV member, please provide a name which you can verify with a form of ID. Non-Columbia University affiliates should state their affiliation (university, organization, friendship, etc.) in their RSVP email. As always, all are welcome.

In addition, we will not be allowing entry after 9:00 PM so that we can get started with the workshop. Doors will open at 8:30 PM. Barbara’s books will be on sale after the workshop at 11pm.

Location: Will be announced upon reservation.

This event is being held thanks to the cooperative support of Q at Barnard College.

GMSMA meeting: Single Tails

Nothing can heat up the cold months quite like the fiery sting from a singetail whip can. The term “singletail” is actually just BDSM slang for single-tailed whip, by the way. It seems only kinky folk need to disambiguate their whips by the number of tails they have.

Anyway, GMSMA’s November meeting is about single tails and, because it’s a part of LeatherFest week, this meeting is open to both men and women!

Do you enjoy the hypnotic crack of the whip? Do you want to see how to swing that single tail? Are you eager to meet single tail tops? Or do you hope to meet a willing bottom? Learn how to take care of your tails and what to expect during a good whipping.

Mmm, whippings. Good ones make me go all weak in the knees.

TES meeting: People of Color Forum moderated by Lady Sabrina and Sir Guy

An important topic I’ve almost never heard addressed is the clear racial divide in the BDSM community. At long last, TES is hosting a forum for the discussion of this exact topic:

When you see images of BDSM and Fetish, do you ask yourself, “Where are the ‘people of color’?” When you go to your favorite dungeon, do you see a cross section of the community, or is it mostly a “whites only” affair? Is it because Blacks, Latinos, Asians and other ‘people of color’ aren’t kinky, or is there some other reason? Join Lady Sabrina and Sir Guy as they moderate a forum on ‘people of color’ in the Scene.

Lady Sabrina and Sir Guy are both long-time TES members and people of color who now hold positions on TES’s Board of Directors. This promises to be an eye-opening meeting and I, for one, am really looking forward to the discussion.

Playing with Sex Toys with Maymay

With Halloween behind us, we’re now only weeks away from the Winter Holiday season, but it’s already getting quite cold! This Monday, grab a cup of hot chocolate or coffee and come out to CV, where maymay will be presenting Playing with Sex Toys, a topic that is sure to warm you up more than your drink!

Very simply, BDSM can be considered a superset of sex, so it makes sense that just about everything you know about having sex can be applied to having kinky sex, too. With this in mind, let’s take a few moments and turn our attentions to those seemingly innocent, common-place sex toys that everyone, kinky and vanilla alike, delight in. What can they do, and—more interestingly—how can we use them for the kinds of kinky sex we like to have? In this presentation, maymay will cover the (obligatory and very handy) basics of sex toy safety and then quickly move on to the less mundane, with a focus on incorporating traditional BDSM activities such as bondage and impact play with sex toys.

Maymay also writes sex toy reviews for EdenFantasys, and occasionally also on his blog. He’ll also be bringing a bunch of various toys to showcase, so expect to see a lot of fun and interesting anal toys. In fact, why not bring in some of your own to show off, too?

Black Rose 2007

One of the largest BDSM events in the Northeast is the annual Black Rose event held in Washington, D.C. at the beginning of December. This year is their 20^th anniversary.

BRXX starts on Friday November 30^th. Workshops will be offered on Friday, Saturday and Sunday with Special Events and Play Parties held on all three nights. We’ve got activities scheduled around the clock to help you enjoy your weekend—from midnight snacks, expanded social areas, expanded play space hours, high tea, Littles and pony activities, celebrity auctions, meet the author hour and so much more.

Registration for the event closes on November 27^th but if you register before October 30^th you’ll get a slight discount.

Update: Great news! As of today, Conversio Virium is happy to announce to that we are officially a Black Rose reciprocal organization. What this means is even greater discounts for Conversio Virium members who wish to attend Black Rose events. When you register, simply declare Conversio Virium as your affiliate organization.